Phanny's Oneshot Gallery
by PhantomInvader
Summary: Plot bunnies, previews, little drabbles, and oneshots I think are cool but not cool enough to deserve their own stories. Now: Partner work is stupid. Warning: contains high amounts of Riley. Proceed with caution.
1. DP and Coraline Together? Nonsense!

**Watched Coraline again. Watched some DP episodes. This happened.**

**This is just a preview to a story I may write in the future (I have WAY too many stories on my plate).  
**

**Disclaimer: Butch Hartman owns Danny Phantom, Neil Gaiman owns Coraline, and Henry Selick owns Wybie Lovat**

* * *

Somehow, in the first two years of high school alone, Danny Fenton had grown to dislike field trips. Museums were boring (though the Amity Park Planetarium was highly entertaining for him), and that was enough of a reason--it was always museums. No trips to the zoo like in first grade.

Even though this current field trip had nothing to do with museums, Danny still got the urge to bang his head against the cold glass window. It was early February, just a bit into the spring semester, and the literature buff-slash-vice principal-slash-teacher of every subject Casper High had to offer had announced in January a field trip. The excitement of a week-long trip had faded when the destination was revealed to be the one and only Oregon Shakespeare Festival in Ashland, Oregon. Lancer was disappointed in the lack of enthusiasm and had then decided that the trip was now worth extra credit--extra credit that Danny was, unfortunately, in dire need of.

"Sam…" Danny's voice came out sounding like a sleepy whine, "encourage me again."

"This is all gonna be worth it in the end," Sam said automatically, repeating the words almost like a mantra, "you won't die of boredom, though I can't promise you won't hemorrhage a little bit."

"Sam, do _you _even believe what you're saying anymore?" Tucker asked, peering over the back of his seat in front of them, "I thought you loved tragic plays. Cause they're like…tragic and full of death and killing."

"Well yeah," Sam sighed dramatically, "but being surrounded by all these uncultured urchins makes it less enjoyable for me."

"Don't cry, your mascara will run," Danny murmured, his eyes closed, "you'll look like…what is it? A harlequin."

"Ten point vocab word," Sam snickered, "your brain isn't mush yet."

"Gettin' there," Danny sighed, "I am so tired."

"Mr. Foley," Lancer's voice sounded from the front of the bus, "sit in that seat properly."

Tucker sighed, sitting back down and disappearing behind the seat in front of Sam and Danny.

All of the talking on the bus grew louder as it grew later in the day. Having been woken up a six AM on a Saturday to catch the bus, all of the teens were sleepy and had been hushed and whispering until about noon. Danny thought the din couldn't get any worse when the long awaited question was finally asked--

"Are we there yet?"

Mikey received a widespread sigh of frustration in reply.

* * *

Coraline Jones was bored.

It didn't help that all she was allowed to do was sit inside and stare at the freshly fallen snow on the ground. Her parents had forbidden her from going out until after she'd eaten her breakfast, even though she kept telling them she wasn't hungry. Adults just didn't realize how important the snow was--Coraline kept imagining why her parents had such a low threshold for fun. Maybe when you were twenty-one you had to go to some lab where they had big machine that sucked all the fun right out of you and replaced it with things like taxes and bill paying and possibly mandatory information on farming techniques and the stock market.

"It's _snowing_," Coraline reminded her parents, "see the white stuff on the ground? That's snow. It's for playing in, which I need to do."

"You need to eat," Mel Jones said firmly, "Take your multi-vitamin, _then _maybe you can go out. I don't want my daughter dying of malnourishment."

"Then stop letting dad cook," Coraline swallowed her vitamin, hating the feeling she got--like she was giving in. "Really. Can I go now?"

"Eat some of your eggs."

"You liar," Coraline grumbled, "seriously. This is insanity."

Despite her defiant thoughts telling her to ignore her mother, her stomach said she should just suck it up and eat. Once she put a decent dent in her eggs, she put her fork down and looked smugly at her mother. She needed to go and play--she promised Wybie a snowball fight and made a bet that she would win. She had five bucks riding on this, she couldn't be late or that cheater Wybie would claim her tardiness made him the winner by default.

"Don't forget to invite him to the Shakespeare festival tomorrow," Mel told her daughter as she headed for the door. Before Coraline could provide a reply Mel spoke again, "yes, you have to go."

Coraline let out a groan but didn't bother to stay inside and argue. She could do that later.


	2. Why Don't You Love Me?

**I usually don't do Mary Sue parodies (frankly I think Suefics make fun of themselves), but I was browsing through phantomsues on lj and this spawned and it all just sort of snowballed into this.**

**

* * *

**You ought to have heard of me, hm? No? Oh, well let me introduce you to the wonder that is me: Mimi Allison Isabella Ashley Barbra Samuels. You ought to know I'm beautiful, too--even when I tumble out of bed on Saturdays (oh, I'm such a klutz! Cute, no?) I am gorgeous from head to toe, and that's _before_ my shower! I smell like strawberries--it's natural, too. My gorgeous knee-length brown hair always shines, even when it's humid it doesn't get frizzy (not like _normal_ girls' hair, ha!), and the purple streaks? All natural, baby.

Ah, my eyes are a stunning shade of green--right now, at least. When I'm calm and serene the color looks so natural, but don't get me mad! They turn red--so you can _tell _when I'm about to bust out my completely irrelevant kung fu skills. Jealous? You ought to be.

Just how special am I? Oh, you haven't had a chance to see my ghost form or my super sexy cat girl form? You're missing out, babe. My gorgeous hair turn an absolutely _radiant _shade of silver (almost matches my rows of pearly white teeth. No cavities--how unladylike!), and the streaks turn pink. Hot pink. Fitting, eh? My delightfully curvy body is clothed in a bright pink top and a very impractical red flowing skirt--bad for fighting, but I _work _it. I'm Mimi Allison Isabella Ashley Barbra Samuels, after all! Everything goes my way. Or else.

I don't walk to school, I strut. I saunter. I walk on air so gracefully it's angelic almost (but I'm still clumsy. That makes sense--in my world what I say goes!). My delightfully petite form is not marred by my C-cup breasts, which all the boys admire as I walk by with my head held high. I'm like catnip to those silly boys! Oh, it's a _curse._

I hum a beautiful tune as I approach my locker. Sigh, how many love notes will be in there today? Probably two or three at least. I open my locker--oh! My mirror is reflecting my perfect face right back at me. Hello gorgeous!

Aw, only two love letters today, from Dash and Kwan. I get a lot of love letters from every boy in school (even a few girls! But I don't swing that way.), it's such a bother! Don't they know I only want one boy? I almost have him too. After all, I'm Mimi Allison Isabella Ashley Barbra Samuels. Everyone loves me!

Ah, those _gorgeous _blue eyes of his captivate me ever so much. Did you know he's one of the only boys who hasn't been after me since I arrived? No matter. He's just playing hard to get. Oh, he's such a cutie!

And he's a half-ghost, just like me! He isn't a cat boy (how sexy would that be? Meow…) but he's so far the only man in this little town who is worthy of my love. I'll get him--I have a siren's voice, one of my many special powers, _that'll_ draw him in to my arms. Even if his eyes are only one color, I cannot turn away. Sometimes he stares at me when I suddenly start singing show tunes to express my love, then he walks away with those unworthy friends of his. Oh, you little tease, you!

I'll get him today--I always get my man. And every other girls' too!

So I stand in front of his locker today, striking my most elegant and sexy pose just for him. Yes, yes, here he comes!

"Uhm, Mimi, right?" Oh, that little darling--pretending he doesn't know my name!

"Of course," two can play at that game, "and you're Danny Fenton?"

"Yup," he said, then he stared into my eyes. Yes, yes!

We both locked gazes, my eyes turning pink with pure love. Oh, Danny, you're so adorable! You know you love me, everyone does! Say it! I watched his mouth begin to open, yes…come on now…

"You're sort of blocking my locker," he glanced down at the books in his hand.

"Oh, am I?" Come on, come on, you silly boy!

"Yeah," Danny said, "can you…move to the side a little bit? I really need to go home."

…What?

"Oh, sure," I'm an extremely well mannered lady, I obliged. I watched as he stuffed his useless school books in his useless locker. Now that he was less distracted, I could ensnare him successfully.

He turned back to me with a nervous smile.

"Well, bye."

_Bye? _That's _all _he said to me? _Bye? _Did he not see how sexy, graceful, and adorable I am?!

I watched his treating form, my eyes now blue with pure despair. Tears streamed from my eyes, and I lingered there. After Danny was long gone, I finally spoke.

"I am Mimi Allison Isabella Ashley Barbra Samuels!" I cried in agony, "_you're supposed to love me!_"

* * *

**Wooo...somebody's got _issues..._**

**Guys--they don't call Danny clueless for nothing. XD**


	3. Around the Campfire

_The door creaked open to reveal a small, nearly empty room. The flickering light of a television bouncing off of the walls and making every color seem washed out and faded, like an old black and white movie. In front of the TV, which showed nothing but a gray show interrupted by enormous amounts of static, was a little boy. He never blinked, his lank, grey eyes never leaving the screen. The young ghost behind him asked in a small voice--_

"_Hello?" It was strange to be frightened of a little boy who had his eyes glued to a flickering screen, absolutely transfixed. "Have you…seen a present around here anywhere?"_

_The young boy's head did a three sixty, his eyes angry, so angry it scared him, and the young ghost thought about fleeing right then._

"_Get. Out of. MY. ROOM!" With each word the boy grew from an innocent child into a hideous monster, towering over the previously larger ghost. The monster's eyes were red as blood, its razor sharp teeth not even fitting in its mouth because of their size. The white fangs dripped with saliva as it hungered for the young ghosts flesh--punishment was needed to show the ghost how rude it was to interrupt and intrude. The monster lurched towards him, it's hideous eyes manic and its matted fur standing on end as it approached to sink its teeth into--_

_

* * *

_Danny stopped narrating his story and looked around the campfire at his classmates in confusion. That was one of the most tame experiences he'd had in the Ghost Zone, one that had nearly slipped his mind to make room for the more severe horrors he'd experienced as a half-ghost superhero. It had terrified him too, early on, but when he looked back on his intrusion on that little boy on his mission to get his parents' anniversary present back, it didn't hold a candle to some of his fights with Plasmius.

His classmates, Mr. Lancer, and Tetslaff all looked a bit pale and shaky. Dash's teeth were chattering, Paulina and Star were hugging each other desperately, and Mikey had dived behind one of the logs around the campfire around which they had all gathered that night.

Sam popped a marshmallow into her mouth nonchalantly, and Tucker looked pleased at Danny's story's effect on the others. They had, of course, been through much worse as well.

"Mr. Fenton," Lancer finally said, "maybe you should let someone else tell a story now."

Danny, Sam, and Tucker shrugged.

"Okay," Danny said, nonplussed.

* * *

**Oh come on, who could tell a better ghost story than those three? XD  
**

**Also, I know that monster kid didn't really try to eat him. What, he's not allowed to embellish a little?  
**


	4. Glee!

**Someone put up a challenge for a GleexDP crossover awhile back. I usually don't do challenges, and I'm not saying I am going to actually write this, but the idea wouldn't leave.**

**So, as of now, this plot bunny is adoptable. Just give me a PM.  
**

**-Phanny**

* * *

The auditorium at William McKinley High was alive with music. The Glee Club, New Directions, was once again practicing for regionals - the competition that was drawing closer and closer, and so stress levels were up, and tempers were high. With the upcoming competition looming over their heads, the thirteen Glee Club member were beginning to notice everything - the slightest sharp or flat notes, a tiny stumble in choreography, any tiny, insignificant thing that they knew Vocal Adrenaline would never get wrong. Anything that would detract from perfection - and if there was anyone on earth who couldn't handle imperfection, it was Rachel Berry.

"Stop, stop!" Rachel cried, and the accompanying banned stopped playing. Will Schuester sighed from his seat in the audience.

"Something wrong, Rachel?" It wasn't really a question that needed to be asked.

"Everything is wrong!" She sighed, "I just don't think the club is doing this song justice. I mean, the Cell Block Tango is a very dramatic song - where is the passion, here? Where's the drama?"

Mercedes rolled her eyes, "I think I know where all the drama is going."

"Say what you want," Rachel huffed, "this is _regionals_. There are no deaf schools or halfway houses here - this is _Vocal Adrenaline_, the top show choir in the district - we _need _to win. I _like _to win, Mr. Schue."

Will looked at his students, and, seeing the annoyed expression on their faces, hated what he said next.

"Rachel is right," he said, "this is nothing like sectionals, and I know you all know that but…be honest, you guys are losing it here. We need to get back in the spirit of competition."

"So…what do you have in mind?" Artie asked. Tina, hovering over his shoulder, nodded and echoed his question quietly.

"I'll think of something, guys," Will assured them, "but for now…from the top."

* * *

"Wait, what?" Danny Fenton asked, bewildered. He looked at Mr. Lancer curiously.

"You heard me, Mr. Fenton. Today is the day to choose your elective class, and I see you haven't done any of that. We have required every student to have at least _one _elective class, or you will be assigned one."

Danny cringed. He didn't want an elective class - he _needed _a free period. He needed _something _to eliminate the guilt of going ghost hunting during school hours. If he had a free period, he could get some work done, and he wouldn't be slowly slipping past the failure radar with low C's.

"But, uh, none of these classes really…interest me. Is there some way I could get out of this? At all?" He asked blatantly. Mr. Lancer thought for a moment.

"Well, if you were involved in some sort of extracurricular activity or club, I could let it slide. Daniel, we are encouraged by the school board to help students branch out from just core classes - I know _you,_ of all people, would want a little part of school to look forward to."

"But…" Danny's eyes scanned the office, looking at various posters for after school activities. Sports teams were out - taking away two thirds of his options - chess club too, drama club was working on a new play and currently wasn't accepting new members (it was already cast), and that left…

"Uh…" Danny winced and readied himself to lie again, "I'm in the Glee Club already." There. Good lie, Fenton.

"Really now?" Lancer looked at him suspiciously. Working with Danny, he'd learned a way to tell whether or not he was lying. His B.S. meter was going crazy at the moment. "So if I asked Ms. Gardener she'd tell me the same thing?"

Danny's stomach flipped over. Horrible lie, horrible idea. Cover up, cover up, cover up-!

"S-sure," Danny's eye twitched a little when he nodded, "would I lie to you?"

Mr. Lancer could feel a headache coming on.

"You're dismissed, Fenton. I hope you're enjoying the Glee Club."

Danny dashed out of Lancer's office, not even waiting for a pass back to class.

…How was he going to tell Sam and Tucker that he'd somehow joined the Casper High Glee Club in the span of five minutes, and that there was pretty much no way out of it?

* * *

**I really wish I could've given Brittany some dialogue. She's adorable.**

**I love and hate Rachel at the same time.**

**I think Danny in a Glee Club would be interesting.**

**In case I didn't make this clear (which I most likely did not), Mr. Schuester's idea is to find a school to compete with without any really high stakes or consequences for losing. Guess which school he finds...?  
**


	5. Glee! Extended because I got bored

**PLOT BUNNY STILL ADOPTABLE I'M JUST EXTENDING THE PILOT A LITTLE.**

**ALSO, CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL.**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**The auditorium at William McKinley High was alive with music. The Glee Club, New Directions, was once again practicing for regionals - the competition that was drawing closer and closer, and so stress levels were up, and tempers were high. With the upcoming competition looming over their heads, the thirteen Glee Club member were beginning to notice everything - the slightest sharp or flat notes, a tiny stumble in choreography, any tiny, insignificant thing that they knew Vocal Adrenaline would never get wrong. Anything that would detract from perfection - and if there was anyone on earth who couldn't handle imperfection, it was Rachel Berry.

"Stop, stop!" Rachel cried, and the accompanying banned stopped playing. Will Schuester sighed from his seat in the audience.

"Something wrong, Rachel?" It wasn't really a question that needed to be asked.

"Everything is wrong!" She sighed, "I just don't think the club is doing this song justice. I mean, the Cell Block Tango is a very dramatic song - where is the passion, here? Where's the drama?"

Mercedes rolled her eyes, "I think I know where all the drama is going."

"Say what you want," Rachel huffed, "this is _regionals_. There are no deaf schools or halfway houses here - this is _Vocal Adrenaline_, the top show choir in the district - we _need _to win. I _like _to win, Mr. Schue."

Will looked at his students, and, seeing the annoyed expression on their faces, hated what he said next.

"Rachel is right," he said, "this is nothing like sectionals, and I know you all know that but…be honest, you guys are losing it here. We need to get back in the spirit of competition."

"So…what do you have in mind?" Artie asked. Tina, hovering over his shoulder, nodded and echoed his question quietly.

"I'll think of something, guys," Will assured them, "but for now…from the top."

* * *

"Wait, what?" Danny Fenton asked, bewildered. He looked at Mr. Lancer curiously.

"You heard me, Mr. Fenton. Today is the day to choose your elective class, and I see you haven't done any of that. We have required every student to have at least _one _elective class, or you will be assigned one."

Danny cringed. He didn't want an elective class - he _needed _a free period. He needed _something _to eliminate the guilt of going ghost hunting during school hours. If he had a free period, he could get some work done, and he wouldn't be slowly slipping past the failure radar with low C's.

"But, uh, none of these classes really…interest me. Is there some way I could get out of this? At all?" He asked blatantly. Mr. Lancer thought for a moment.

"Well, if you were involved in some sort of extracurricular activity or club, I could let it slide. Daniel, we are encouraged by the school board to help students branch out from just core classes - I know _you,_ of all people, would want a little part of school to look forward to."

"But…" Danny's eyes scanned the office, looking at various posters for after school activities. Sports teams were out - taking away two thirds of his options - chess club too, drama club was working on a new play and currently wasn't accepting new members (it was already cast), and that left…

"Uh…" Danny winced and readied himself to lie again, "I'm in the Glee Club already." There. Good lie, Fenton.

"Really now?" Lancer looked at him suspiciously. Working with Danny, he'd learned a way to tell whether or not he was lying. His B.S. meter was going crazy at the moment. "So if I asked Ms. Gardener she'd tell me the same thing?"

Danny's stomach flipped over. Horrible lie, horrible idea. Cover up, cover up, cover up-!

"S-sure," Danny's eye twitched a little when he nodded, "would I lie to you?"

Mr. Lancer could feel a headache coming on.

"You're dismissed, Fenton. I hope you're enjoying the Glee Club."

Danny dashed out of Lancer's office, not even waiting for a pass back to class.

…How was he going to tell Sam and Tucker that he'd somehow joined the Casper High Glee Club in the span of five minutes, and that there was pretty much no way out of it?

* * *

Danny decided to tell the both of them at lunch. Sam looked disappointed (most likely in his inability to come up with a more decent excuse), while Tucker just thought the entire thing was the most hilarious event in the history of forever.

"Just go to Ms. Gardener, she's cool," Sam told Danny after Tucker had stopped laughing, "tell her you want to observe a rehearsal or something - if Lancer comes in to investigate, he'll see you there, think you're telling the truth, and be on his way."

"Sam it's _never _that easy," Danny sighed, "what kind of teacher slash show choir director will let a kid hide out during a rehearsal without asking questions?"

"I'm telling you what I think will work, the rest is up to you, genius," Sam rolled her eyes as she spoke, "you got yourself into this."

"Maybe you should take home ec, D," Tucker snickered, "you could make cupcakes in there."

"Tucker…" Danny groaned, "anyway, Sam, there is no way that whole observation thing will work."

* * *

"Observe a rehearsal?" Adrianna Gardener, Choir instructor for Casper High, looked down at young Danny Fenton in curiosity. "Oh, fine. At first I thought you might be here because you wanted a free period and, to get out of selecting an elective class, told Mr. Lancer that you were a member of the Glee Club and couldn't handle any other extracurricular."

Danny's jaw dropped.

"You'd be surprised at how often that sort comes around here," Ms. Gardener told the boy, walking further into her choir room and instructing him to follow, "now, is that why you're here?"

Danny searched around the room, avoiding her green gaze, and eventually sighed.

"I'm sorry," he told her, "I mean, I'm sure Glee Club is _really _fun and all but, I have…other things that make it so I _need _a free period so…if you just give me an excuse not to get an elective I'll pay you back somehow, I swear."

Danny wasn't sure he liked the calculating look on Ms. Gardener's face before she turned around at the sound of her phone ringing.

"Excuse me," she said, leaving Danny to sit on one of the choir risers and wait until he heard those dreaded words…

"Mr. Lancer, what can I do for you?"

_Oh god no._

"Danny Fenton…?"

_Please…_

"Yes, he is a member. Would that sweet boy lie to you?"

_Yes!_

"Good talking to you, sir. Have a nice afternoon."

Danny breathed a sigh of relief when the teacher reappeared.

"Thank you, I really do owe you for that." He said, somehow knowing he would regret those words as soon as she opened her mouth to reply.

"And I know just how you can repay me, Danny," she said. The real Glee members were beginning to enter the room as she spoke, "thank you for joining the Glee Club."

…_What?_

_

* * *

_**Don't stop believin'.**_  
_


	6. Sleep Deprivation Challenge

Okay so. The last thing I need is more stories on my hands, so here's a nifty challenge based on an idea I've head in my head for awhile now.

Here's the challenge: Danny, tired of being called a loser by Dash, takes the bet that Dash gives him: Go a week (Monday-Friday in this case) without one minute of sleep. It seems like a small, pointless thing and, seeing as Danny has gone through life without a lot of sleep due to his ghost-fighting, he doesn't think it's a big deal and he thinks he can do it easily.

However…lack of sleep can make a person do and say a lot of crazy things…

5 Sleep Deprivation Symptoms...

1. Irritable: This is an enormous feeling of being annoyed and bothered. Doesn't matter what you're doing or even who you're talking to, you just can't stand it any more. People you know and are friends with annoy the hell out of you and every little thing around you seems to bother you, no matter how small. Your "anger" isn't directed at any one thing in particular, but everything in general.

2. Tired: You'll instantly know the difference between this sort of tired and your typical "been a long day" type of tired. When you're insomnia tired, it's as though you are completely drained of energy. You don't feel like doing anything aside from sitting on a couch or laying down on your bed. Any sort of activity exhausts you, including just thinking about doing activities.

3. Lack of Concentration: You can't focus on anything you do, nor can you have a full conversation with those you know. It could be a task as simple as calling a pizza delivery place, but you'll still be confused and slightly disoriented.

4. Poor Memory: You memory isn't gone, per say, it's just faded, or not as sharp. You can remember certain things you were and/or are supposed to do as well as events that have happened in your life. But, when it comes to specific details, you're completely lost.

5. Reaction time: Of all the sleep deprivation symptoms, this is the most severe, as it physically impacts you and your ability to function. You won't be comatose or anything like that, but you will be functioning much less effectively than you were before - hand eye coordination, critical thinking, problem solving, reaction time, etc. it all goes out the window. As a matter of fact, it's been proven in studies that a person who is severely lacking sleep operates at about the same level as someone who is intoxicated.

Pairings: Whatever - there really shouldn't be any need for them but if you feel the need it doesn't matter who.

OC's: If you need them for the story, go right ahead.

Just tell me in a review if you do it - you don't need my permission, it's a challenge.

Please credit me for the idea.

That's just the basic stuff and some symptoms. What else happens is up to you.

Will he make it to Friday? What are the terms of the bet (who gets what if one of them loses)? Will Amity Park be doomed on account of their sleep deprived hero?

...these questions are for you. I don't know.


	7. It's On, Now

**So...this plot bunny is adoptable, maybe it'll spark someone's imagination. It's been in my head for awhile.  
**

**This is NOT a Danny beating up Dash story. I know it's awesome to show off Danny's strength, but I think a clever prank war would show off some of the smarts he's probably acquired from fighting as well...being sneaky, creative, and maybe a liiittle vindictive...**

**Anyway, Danny doesn't hurt the innocent in the show, but he HAS played pranks on Dash, and I'd love to see a story that played with that more (point one out to me if you know any!). The pranks can be anywhere from ghost-powered ones to just plain childish ones (I was thinking dead, rotting fish in his locker, the bastard).  
**

**So, either way, it's a Danny gets Revenge fic, and we all know how satisfying those can be.**

**So...just review if you like this, then!**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**Danny Fenton hated gym class. Frankly, he hardly knew anyone who _didn't_ hate gym class - even the most athletic students hated it, because they didn't get to compete in sports with their respective extracurricular team, who were more suited to playing them well, and instead had to play with the losers and wimps who could hardly catch a ball. Where's the fun in that?

Well, Dash Baxter managed to find some enjoyment out of that fact alone. He had so much pent up aggression…sure, he could roughhouse with his football teammates, but it was nice to have someone who couldn't fight back just so he didn't even have to try.

Yes, it was cruel and immature, but Dash was always a little immature at heart. He never got in trouble, why not milk his privileges? There's no way he would get away with it after high school, he had to get it out of his system now.

His favorite target was Fenton, not because he was the scrawniest guy he knew (though that certainly played a big part in it in the beginning), but because near the end of freshman year he had become more…interesting. More defiant, more daring, more disrespectful to the kind of Casper High, so beating him up felt so much more rewarding.

It wasn't until that day, that fateful day, that Dash would realize exactly how far he could push Fenton before he got serious. Very, _very_ serious.

* * *

It was Thursday, a sunny day which allowed the class to go outside and play the sport of the week - baseball, in this case. Dash was better at football, but he was certainly better at baseball than most of the other kids in the class.

Dash was pissed. This morning when he had gone to give Fenton his daily beating, and he had pushed _right past him_, as if he wasn't even there. Well, okay, it was like he was there because Fenton pushed him (surprisingly hard) out of his way, almost slamming him into a locker. Though the raven-haired kid didn't seem to notice his mistake, and he did seem awfully tired and otherwise unaware of his surroundings, Dash wouldn't be quick to forget.

Fenton was up to bat. Dash was the pitcher.

Tetslaff was watching, so Dash desperately tried to resist the urge to make Fenton pay until after class, but it was so strong. As he wound up the pitch, he realized too late that he had aimed a little higher than necessary…

When the Manson girl pushed him out of her way (again! Why was he the one getting pushed around!), he realized that Fenton was down, and several other kids were cautiously walking toward him, the others didn't quite know what to do. Dash wondered if anyone would notice if he went to see what was obviously his handiwork.

"Oh, he's bleeding!" A girl Dash sort of recognized (her name escaped him), cried. Manson had grabbed a tissue from the pocket of her gym shorts and was quickly dabbing at Fenton's left eye, which was quickly bruising.

"All right, out of the way," Tetslaff's rough voice cut through the murmuring, "ugh, that's gonna be a shiner."

At that moment Fenton opened his good eye, groaning and sitting up slowly. Confused, he pawed at his stubborn left eye, the one that refused to open.

"Don't touch it!" Manson told him, grabbing his hand, "you'll make it worse."

"It won't open!" He replied.

"Manson, take him to the nurse," Tetslaff interrupted, "everyone else, back in your positions! Nothing to see here!"

Dash was relieved that he wasn't in trouble, and looked over at Fenton's retreating back only to see him turn around and give him what had to be the most surprisingly frightening glare he had ever received.

…Maybe he _was _in trouble.

* * *

**Damn right you are, boy.**


	8. Gotta Catch 'Em All?

**My god what have I done?**

**Answer: PokemonxDP crossover.**

**Status: Adoptable  
**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**For the first time in a long time, Danny Fenton felt - for a split second only - that his head was empty. As he lay unconscious in the grass, there were no thoughts, no emotion, and no memory. It all began to come back to him soon - except for the memory, of course. As he slowly dragged himself into wakefulness, he realized several things.

One: he was laying flat on his back in grass, and, judging by the pain that rushed through him when he tried to move, he assumed he landed there from above. _Hard_.

Two: the area around him was green and forested, he could hear water in the distance, and it was most definitely _not_ Amity park.

And finally, three: there was something sitting on his chest, preventing him from getting up.

Danny readied himself for some sort of blow - he never liked anything on him restricting his movement, it never turned out well. He waited and braced himself. He was in no condition to fight anyone or any_thing_, but he could defend himself at the very least.

Nothing happened.

When he bothered to open his eyes, they met two big, brown ones.

Danny was looking into the wide-eyed gaze of…_something_.

Seriously what _was _that? It wasn't a cat, nor was it a dog, or a fox…it looked almost like a combination of the three. It was about the size of a small cat, had ridiculously large ears, a cream-colored tuft around it's neck, and a bushy tail. It was not the weirdest creature Danny had ever seen, but he'd never seen it before - what _was_ it?

The thing blinked innocently, and decided to tell him.

"Eevee!*"

Was that some sort of odd call, or - Danny didn't know what drew him to this conclusion - a name?

Whatever it was, this "Eevee" thing looked relatively harmless. Danny got up the courage to lift it so he could get up in a sitting position, and he just continued to hold it out in front of him, examining it.

"Eevee! Eee!" The creature struggled out of his hands and landed on his lap, were it curled up comfortably.

"Uh…okay…" Danny sighed. He decided to leave it - he wouldn't be moving anytime soon, not until he knew where to go.

Danny tried to remember what had gotten him to this place. Fuzzy images flew through his mind, showing him, Sam, and Tucker, the Infimap, and an angry walker and his guards tailing them.

"I guess the map took us here…" Danny mused, "why? And what was walking chasing us for anyway…?"

Most importantly, where were his friends? That's what he had to do first, he had to find them.

The Eevee twitched as Danny lifted it off of his lap in order to stand up. It let out something that resembled a whine and pawed at his leg.

"Uhm," Danny moved his leg, which annoyed the little thing, "look, I need to go. You…go back to wherever you came from all right? There must be some…odd…exotic animal hoarder missing you."

The Eevee looked at him almost defiantly. Could it understand him?

"Eee!" It growled stubbornly. Danny sighed and just turned away, starting to walk through the woods. Various twig snaps and rustles behind him alerted him that he was being followed. He turned around sharply, heard a small squeak of fear, and scanned the area to see the tip of a certain creatures tail peeking out of the bushes.

Damn, that thing was determined to follow him.

When Danny turned back around, however, he realized he had much more pressing problems to deal with.

As in, a bipedal rabbit-like thing with sharp spines on its back and _extremely_ sharp teeth growling at him**. And the worst part? Staying still didn't soothe it or convince it that Danny was harmless. He knew that because it jumped at him after just a few moments.

Danny's first instinct was to zap it, and so he tried.

Tried.

'_What?' _This is when the brave hero Danny Phantom began to panic, _'why isn't that working?'_

He barely got out of the way fast enough for the thing to land on the ground. He tried to go ghost - no dice.***

Well, this was problematic.

Suddenly feeling weak and powerless, Danny just backed away even farther, ducking in time for a quick, dark sphere of energy to pass over his head, coming from behind him****. The rabbit-thing was knocked off of its feet and looked disoriented for a moment. Then, a big ball of fur flew past Danny so quickly he almost missed it, and the Eevee rammed the hostile creature square in the chest.

Danny had no idea how a twelve pound fox-thing could take out the monster that had attacked him, but somehow, that's the way it worked out. The attacker ran off into the forest reluctantly, hating having lost to such a tiny opponent.

Eevee turned and looked at Danny - was that hint of smugness in its eyes? -and blinked innocently, tilting its head to the side.

"Okay, okay," Danny sighed, "I need to find my friends but…unfortunately I might need your help - whoa!" Danny yelled in surprise as the Eevee leaped at him, climbing up on his shoulder and licking Danny's face.

"You've been planning that, haven't you?" Danny grumbled.

"Eee!"

Danny just started walking. It was better than arguing with an Eevee.

* * *

***The Pokemon Danny would meet was a toss-up between Shinx and Eevee. Seeing as I'm training an entire party of Eeveelutions (Espeon, Umbreon, Flareon, Vaporeon, Jolteon, and Glaceon), I chose Eevee.**

****That would be Nidorina**

*****If Danny had his powers, well, then he wouldn't need any Pokemon now would he?**

******I'm not going by game rules. Because then someone would have had to give Eevee a TM to teach it Shadow Ball, and this Eevee is wild. AND SHADOW BALL IS AWESOME.**


	9. Haunting

**It's late for Halloween, but my film class had a horror movie night as a fundraiser on the first (day after Halloween, even), which I did not go to. They showed three horror films, one of which they did not finish. So, in 2nd period yesterday, I did not get a choice in whether or not I got to stay and watch _The Haunting in Conneticut_. I am VERY squeamish, so I had to avert my eyes the whole freakin' period, but just the sounds and the plot got this idea churning in my head.**

**Status: Adoptable**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**Danny stared boredly ahead as he sat in his desk. Mrs. Mims, his algebra teacher, had to have one of the most droning, emotionless voices he had ever heard. Even Mr. Lancer's usually sleep-inducing lectures had a little bit of effort put into them, but Mims just acted like she didn't care about algebra, her students, or…anything.

Danny looked sideways at the new girl who had been introduced at the beginning of class - even though he hadn't really been paying attention. When he looked at her, he realized that _she_ had been looking at _him_. He quickly turned back to the front of the room - the class didn't need two freaky staring people. Danny tried to remember the girl's name, because it looked like she was showing some sort of interest in him. He caught sight of the bracelet on her arm, engraved with the word "Heather." Well, that solved that problem.

The bell for lunch rang after what seemed like an eternity, and sure enough, Heather approached him at the door. She blushed, but wasn't afraid to look him in the eye.

"Hey, uhm, I'm Heather. You know, I just moved here a couple of weeks ago and…well, you're Danny Fenton, right?"

Danny nodded. Heather looked relieved and continued.

"People told me that your parents hunt ghosts for a living…" she trailed off.

"Yeah…?" Danny prompted her to continue.

"Well, I was wondering - and feel free to call me a freak or a crazy person but…I was wondering if I could talk to them because I think…" Heather moved closer to Danny and lowered her voice, "I-I think my new house might be haunted."

Heather obviously wasn't aware of Amity Park's "ghost capital of the world" status, or she wouldn't expect Danny to call her crazy. Danny sighed - nowadays, haunted houses were so normal that it was depressing.

"I don't think you're a freak or crazy, but I think my parents wouldn't mind if I came to check it out first-" and took care of it, he thought to himself, "-just to see. Would you mind that?"

"Anything," Heather sounded a little relieved, "just…a lot of weird stuff is going on. Thank you."

Danny nodded and went to lunch. It was probably just a mischievous poltergeist, but he couldn't rule anything out. He needed to tell Sam and Tucker that they would be going on a little field trip after school.

* * *

"Creepy, isn't it?" Heather asked as she, Danny, Sam, and Tucker arrived at her new home.

Even Danny had to agree. Of all the homes in Amity Park, who on earth would rent this one? The paint was peeling, the wood on the porch was moldy, and some of the windows were cracked. Something about it - Danny couldn't describe it - just made it feel eerie.

"They said it was a fixer-upper," Heather said dryly.

"If by 'fixing it up' you mean 'demolishing and starting from scratch,' then I agree," Tucker said, looking suitably freaked out as well.

"Well, the outside isn't as bad as the inside…" Heather walked up the creaking steps, and the door creaked so loudly that it actually resembled a baby's cry. She walked in, her sneaker's making a racket as she walked across the hardwood floors. Sam and Tucker followed, but as soon as Danny crossed the threshold, he didn't feel the cold presence of any ghost he'd encountered. His ghost sense didn't go off. He felt a burning sensation under his skin, but pushed himself further inside the house. It only took a few steps for a hot, choking mist to build in his throat and exit his mouth - but this mist was deep blood red, almost black. He felt Sam, Tucker, and Heather surrounding him, asking him what was wrong, but he could barely hear them. A frightening growl was ringing through his ears, blocking out any other sound, and it felt like there was pressure all around him, squeezing him to death.

Danny realized at that point that there was no poltergeist, no mischief maker, or even anyone he perceived as a genuine threat, like Skulker or Vlad. What he was dealing may not even _be_ a ghost - but something truly, inherently evil.

* * *

**I don't even LIKE horror stories/movies, but you can't tell me that a story like this wouldn't be freakin' awesome.**

**_SPOILERS BELOW:_  
**

**For those of you who don't know exactly what the movie was about, a family moves into a house that was formerly a funeral home, the former occupants of the funeral home were Satan worshippers or something, the teenaged boy keeps getting visions and is sometimes possessed by the spirit of a young man who was a seer, spirit boy was trying to release the spirits but the demonic dude who ran the funeral home tried to kill the family (for once, nobody really died during the movie), there are bodies hidden in the walls, things burn down, but, for ONCE, the story gets a semi-happy ending.  
**


	10. He's a Little Hoarse! Get it? Huh? Meh

**So yeah. This is from 'Chatting to Chat,' the bit where tonsillitis comes in. I don't know why I torture Danny so much. I just like the idea of a superhero not being super all the time. And having normal problems. Because Danny's still a kid, guys.**

**So...here you go. Oh, and a shout out to my friend Amy, who recently had her tonsils out...heh, a shout out to someone who quite literally cannot shout. Heh. Sorry Amy.**

**Oh, and Status: Well, it's adoptable if you can think of anything you want to do with it...not a lot to work with, here.  
**

**-Phanny**

* * *

Doctor's Office waiting rooms had never really bothered Maddie Fenton on their own. She was used to sterile, busy environments - she worked in a lab herself, albeit it was her own. No, she hated doctor's offices because whenever she was there (at least, not for a check-up), it meant that something was wrong with either her or one of her family members. She turned the page of her outdated magazine that lay in her lap with one hand, the other stroking her ailing son's hair as he leaned against her shoulder (something he didn't normally do), half-asleep, his breathing raspy and coughing ever so often.

Danny had been sick for a few days so far, and Maddie had made an appointment with his doctor when she realized that whatever was ailing him probably wasn't going to go away on its own. He had been plagued with a sore throat and had lost his voice, and his coughs sounded so deep and painful that his mother couldn't help but worry. Before he'd lost his voice, he'd mentioned having trouble swallowing, and he had a fever.

"Fenton?" The nurse called, and Maddie shook her son out of his stupor and helped him up out of his seat. He opened a pair of bleary blue eyes, and they themselves almost begged her, "please don't make me get up, I want to sleep."

They were directed into a room and given the standard "the doctor will be right with you." Danny, even though he hated examination tables for some reason, gratefully took the chance to lay down. Maddie saw the dark circles beneath his eyes and didn't blame him. The door to the room opened, and Danny's doctor, Dr. Harrison, walked into the room with his usual kind smile. He took a look at Danny and gently nudged his shoulder, prodding the teen to open his eyes.

"Hey, Danny," he said gently, "what's eatin' you today?"

Maddie explained Danny's ailments to the doctor, seeing as Danny couldn't talk, and Dr. Harrison's smile turned into a calculating frown.

"All right, can you sit up?" Danny nodded, doing so slowly. "Okay, open wide. That's it…" Dr. Harrison winced, "looks like tonsillitis again. This is about the third time you've had it in the last two years. It really stinks, doesn't it?"

Danny just nodded.

"All right, well, I'm going to go ahead and give you the usual antibiotics, but this is getting to be what we call 'chronic.' Now you need to come see me for a follow-up in about a week, but I think we may have to consider taking those things out. They're certainly not doing you any good."

Maddie saw how Danny froze.

'_Waitwaitwait…getting them out means surgery, surgery involves cutting, tonsils are in my throat, they would be cutting my _throat_, one wrong cut could be…nononononoNO! No surgeries! I'm fine! Just give me the meds, you quack!'_

Danny wanted to protest, but any attempt was lost in a wild fit of coughing.

* * *

**A small rant:**

**For people who say that Danny is not affected regular pain (Dash's punches, bullet wounds (seriously, bullet wounds?), etc.) ...how does that work? He's experienced worse things sure, but still...we've all experienced way worse things than paper cuts, but when you do get one, it still hurts like shit. Just because you've experienced worse pain doesn't mean that stuff that hurt before doesn't still hurt later on.**

**/rant**

**I'm done.  
**


	11. Acceptance

**Not much to say about this, but I want you guys to know that someone reported Chatting to Chat because it's against the ToS (which should come as no surprise to you, and if it does, shame on you)**. **I'm not going to delete it, but if actually decides to take action I will not be putting it back up on this site. I'll put it up DeviantART if I feel like it. Frankly, I'd like to focus on my serious fics, and I've been having an awful feeling like you guys only like me for that silly mess, so I want you guys to actually read what I've worked hard on. That's not unreasonable.**

**-Phanny  
**

**

* * *

**There it was.

He'd been waiting for it for so long. Seventeen-year-old Danny Fenton held the envelope in his shaking hands as he looked at the fancy stamp on the corner of it.

University of Illinois Amity Park. Not an Ivy League school, but a good school. The one that had very good programs for astronomy and aerospace physics and engineering. All necessary things if he wanted to be an astronaut.

Ever since he had been revealed to the world as Danny Phantom, so many things had improved. Sure, he had little privacy, but that was something he had gotten used to. What mattered was that now that his needs were understood, he had really gotten his grades up - proving that he was pretty smart when it came right down to it.

His fame would make any school give him a shot.

He really wanted this school.

_Why couldn't he bring himself to open the letter_?

This shouldn't be this hard!

'_Come on Fenton, you've applied to other schools…if you don't get into this one, it's not the end of the world…' _He knew this for sure. He'd been through the end of the world. But even that seemed less nerve-wracking.

Danny let his acceptance/rejection letter fall to the counter and just stared at it until he heard the front door open. He didn't look at his mother, who appeared in the kitchen and set her keys on the counter. He only noticed her when she put a hand on his shoulder.

"Is that the letter you've been waiting for?" She asked with a hint of excitement. Her son nodded. "Are you going to open it?"

Danny looked at her with nervous blue eyes, "maybe…"

"Well I hope it's sometime before September, honey," Maddie pulled out a chair to sit next to him, "what's wrong?"

"I really want to go to this school, mom," Danny sighed, "what if they don't want me?"

"Well why wouldn't they?" Maddie squeezed her son's shoulder lightly in reassurance, "you've gotten better grades, you've definitely got some 'community service' under your belt, if being a superhero counts, and you _did_ save the world…they'd be hard-pressed to find another person like you."

Danny didn't respond, and Maddie took this as an invitation to slide the letter over to her, "all right, would you feel better if I opened it for you?"

Danny nodded hesitantly.

He heard the crinkling paper of a letter being opened, and his mother unfolded the letter and scanned it. Danny stared down at the countertop, and he saw the letter out of the corner of his eye - his mother was sliding it over to him, forcing him to look at it.

_Daniel Fenton,_

_Thank you for applying to the Unviversity of Illinois Amity Park. We have reviewed your application and are pleased-_

"Mom, mom, they said they're _pleased_! See - see, look at it! 'We are pleased'-"

"Honey, finish reading it," Maddie chuckled.

"Right…"

_-to inform you of your successful application to the school and that you have been accepted. We look forward to your attendance in the 2011 Fall semester…_

Danny didn't finish reading. He knew what he needed to know. After a hug from his mother and much showing off of his letter to Jazz - who was home from college for the summer - he looked at it again in amazement. Then he decided the most appropriate action to take.

"_This is so going on FaceBook!_"

* * *

**Okay yeah, based on real life. I pretended my letter was from Hogwarts for the first few minutes - because I do things like that.  
**

**I'M GOING TO COLLEGE. AW YEAH.**


	12. Finals: Only the Strong Survive

**Danny and Jack bonding? But of course!**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**"So, that makes salt a covalent - no, ionic - no, no, it's covalent, I'm sure of it, salt is a covalent bond…ack! What's the difference?" A loud slam echoed through the Fenton house one Tuesday night - the very last Tuesday night before winter break. Finals week. And Danny Fenton was freaking out.

"Ionic bonds are…wait, no - they're…they donate electrons to one another, and covalent…no! Is it…_who cares?_"

Jack Fenton hesitantly walked up to his son at the kitchen table, wary that he may be hindering one of the few instances where his son was actually _studying_. Not just looking at his book blankly, but _studying_ it.

"Uh…Danny?"

"_WHAT?_" Jack jumped back as his son started, turning around and glaring daggers at whoever had disturbed him. The moment he saw his father, his expression softened. "Sorry dad…I just…"

"It's all right, Danny-boy," Jack sat down next to his son, looking at the source of his stress - a sheet of paper marked "Chemistry Study Guide for Final Exam." Jack winced.

"Oh, a study guide," he said, "I always hated these things. How long do you have to finish it?"

"Until _tomorrow_," Danny said hopelessly, "chemistry is stupid."

Jack smirked at his son's habit - ever since he could talk, anything he didn't like or quite understand was automatically stupid.

"Well, son," Jack said, "I may look a bit dim when compared to your mother - but who doesn't? - but in the science department, we're about equal. And yes, even ghost hunting involves a little bit of chemistry. So what's the issue here…" Jack glanced at the paper, seeing one question where the line underneath was covered with eraser marks so thick that if any answer was scrawled down it would be lost in the gray-black smudges of what remained of Danny's previous guesses.

"I can see a little bit of the word 'ionic' here…" Jack squinted at the erased word, "and that's right. Salt is an ionic bond."

"But why does it _matter_?" Danny asked, his head down on the table and pillowed in his arms, "I mean, it's _salt. _Is, like, the world going to end if I call it a covalent bond once by mistake? I don't get the difference…"

"What do you get when you think of the word 'co-'?" Jack asked.

"I think of…like, together…like co-workers and stuff…"

"Right. And covalent bonds…?"

"Share electrons?" It was dawning on him, Jack could see it. "So…like…they're together."

"That's right."

Danny nodded, not quite enthusiastic, "thanks, dad."

Jack frowned, "something else wrong?" Jack didn't know what that question had gotten him into. Danny took a deep breath and started talking so fast that Jack could hardly comprehend it.

"Well along with this I have my English final which is a test over all the books we've read and then a timed essay on Hamlet then for my media class I have to finish editing my film then I need to study for my math final which is really hard because I hate math and there's just too much for me to do and I hate school so much right now dad-"

"Danny, calm down!" Jack said hurriedly, afraid his son was going to run out of air.

"I can't calm down when the public school system is trying to screw me over with all of this…this _work_."

Jack felt guilty for what he was about to say, but seeing as Danny was beginning to develop a rather unappealing eye-twitch…

"Normally I wouldn't want you to stop working on this, but I think you should probably go and take a break for awhile."

Danny nodded, "I…I think…yeah that might be good. I was up late last night too, you know…and when I tried to help Riley with her new interest in cake decorating I freaked out because I thought the cake was crooked…dad, she doesn't take criticism very well - I think there's still frosting in my hair."

"Well, school's almost out, son, just a little longer," Jack reassured him. He nodded shakily, sitting down on the couch. After a moment of silence, he looked up at his father.

"This is where you tell me that it all gets easier as I get older, right?"

Jack averted his eyes.

"I'm going to go help your mother in the lab."

"Dad?"

"Take a rest for a few minutes and then you should probably take another stab at that study guide."

"Dad!" Danny called desperately after his father, "it does get easier, right?"

"Can't talk now son-"

"_Dad__!_"

* * *

**I seem to be into RL based idea right now...only I'm not taking chemistry or math.**

**Jack seems to be dodging the issue in that last part.**

**Also, I've decided that Riley will be a cake decorator when she grows up.  
**


	13. A Senior Prank Most Fowl

**This is also real-life based. And it was awesome. Seriously it was freaking EPIC.**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**Danny was eager for the last day of school before winter break. Jazz, however, didn't seem to be nearly as enthused, and Danny was _dying _to find out why. It wasn't because she loved school so much she didn't want a break - Jazz could really use one - it was something else. Something else was bothering her.

Danny just happened to have his door open while Jazz walked down the hall, talking angrily on her phone, and Danny's sensitive hearing (no, he wasn't trying to listen in - superheroes don't eavesdrop) picked up some of her one-sided conversation.

"Cynthia, don't you dare - no, I don't _care_ what Alex says, it is _not_ a good idea. I know senior pranks are supposed to be crazy but…Cynthia? Oh, don't you _dare_ hang up on me-!"

Senior prank? Yes! Jazz was a senior, she would know about it. And since Jazz was his sister, she had to tell Danny, right? If he asked very nicely…

"Jazz," Danny knocked on her doorframe and put on his most diplomatic, sophisticated voice, "we're brother and sister - we share things. I share my superhero life with you and _you_…well, if you wanted to get even with me, you would share something with me, right? Maybe your feelings, something that's bothering you…a senior prank…"

"Oh no," Jazz shook her head, "I'm not involved in that mess."

"Oh come on!" Danny tried in vain to keep the childish whine out of his voice, "I'll bet it's good - wait, does it involve people picking on me? Because people like to do that. You're not TPing things, are you? Because that's lame. Does it involve-"

"Danny, I'm not involved. I'm not going to tell you anything."

"You're not involved, fine, but you know. Please, Jazz?"

No dice. _'All right, Danny, time to use genetics to your advantage…'_

Jazz looked over to see a pair of what had to be the saddest, most pathetic blue-eyed gaze that Danny had ever given her, and he bit his lip slightly in a hurt expression that almost broke her. Almost.

"Maybe you should do what I did when someone kept a huge secret from me," she told him with a glare, and Danny's expression soured, "find out for yourself."

Danny heaved a great sigh and left the room, "point acknowledged."

* * *

Danny was late to first period again. Technus wasn't that hard to beat, but it still took him longer than he had hoped. Oh, he was so going to get it…

Still, Danny couldn't get his mind off of the elusive senior prank. Second period was the last class of the half-day and first period was just about to let out. He hadn't seen one cool thing…

Wait…

"How much longer 'til the bell rings?" Danny recognized the hushed voice under the stairs - Jazz's friend Cynthia. He also heard a subdued clucking sound coming from the same direction. What in the world…?

"Just a couple of seconds, go ahead and let 'em go."

Let what go?

"All right, bell in three…two…one…"

The bell rang signaling the end of class, and almost at the exact same time five live chickens wandered out from under the stairwell. It didn't take long for Danny to hear squealing and shouts of "oh my god - chickens!"

He looked up at the squeals of people upstairs - chickens there too?

No, he heard a shout from Mr. Lance. "_Lord of the Flies_! What are all these pigeons doing up here?"

Pigeons and chickens. The senior prank…_pigeons and chickens._

After seeing everyone either scramble away from them or go out of their way to try and pick one up, Danny decided his exact feelings.

"Awesome."

* * *

**Last day of school was today. You know what that means? Yes! IT'S SMUGGLE LIVE BIRDS INTO THE SCHOOL DAY! :D**

**How did they not get caught doing that - now that is a question right there...**

**You're asked not to bring your backpack on half days of school, they're afraid of silly string and other unsavory things. I don't think pigeons and chickens were among the things they were looking out for, though...**

**Phanny's train of thought today: "oh we're not doing anything in second period I have such awful cramps right now I just want to go home I'm going to call mom almost to the classroom what everybody standing around for HOLY CRAP THAT'S A CHICKEN."  
**


	14. Replay

**I swore to god I would never base a fic on a song, but I did. And it's for an OC-centric oneshot, too. Haters all around, yo.**

**Goddammit, if I could think of a way to make those two lines unnecessary, I would delete them, but at the current time I have driven over 600 miles for 11 hours straight and this idea popped into my head and I felt that I must share it. I'll think more on it later.  
**

**The song "Replay" is by Iyaz. Danny Phantom is owned by Butch Hartman, Nickelodeon, Viacom, etc. I own Riley and Xander.**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**Riley Matthews was, admittedly, far from normal. She had only been away from her home in Amity Park once – and that was only because she hadn't even lived there yet, having moved from Galveston, Texas to the small Illinois town when she was five. But from the stories she could make up on the spot, one would think she had traveled the world. Xander's favorite story was about how she battled a panda bear because it looked at her funny – probably because he knew that she couldn't hurt a fly.

Riley was "jamming" to her iPod while Xander drove his Toyota Camry - a gift from his parents on his seventeenth birthday – back to her house. His hands were once again sweaty for reasons he didn't understand. It only happened when Riley was around, even when she looked completely ridiculous, listening to one of her songs and doing some sort of headbanging that could only be done by her or an epileptic ferret.

Xander could sense that she was looking at him, and when he reached a stop light he took his eyes off the road and stared back at her. Oh man, it was her "I want something, and I'm going to pretend I care about whether or not you give me permission" look.

"I _love _this song," she said, in an eerily serious voice. She pointed to the volume dial on the radio, and continued, "I danced to it once at a talent competition – well, okay, I was a backup dancer, and we didn't win, but it was fun and I rocked it."

"I don't doubt it," Xander smiled to himself. He admired her excitement despite the fact that she had lost. Especially since she was keeping her promise to try and not to be such a sore loser all the time. Danny had made her promise after she had thrown a fit about something – arm wrestling? Xander didn't know why she had taken the loss so hard, Danny was one of the strongest guys he knew.

_Shawty's like a melody in my head…_

Oh god, this song.

Xander's hands grew even sweatier, and he swore he had a hot flash that would make a woman in menopause feel like she was in Antarctica. _This song._

"Xander?" Riley said from next to him, "Xaaanderr…" his name was long and drawn out by her voice, "Xander the light is green. You can go now. People are honking."

"Wha? Oh – yeah." Xander blushed and pressed the gas pedal with his foot. '_You're cool, Xander, you're cool. It's all good.'_

"Can't believe this guy's name is Iyaz," Riley said idly, swaying with the music in her seat, "s'not a name – an invalid Scrabble move…that's what it is."

Xander just nodded, distracted.

You see, Xander was a hopeless romantic, and sometimes, no matter how rude it made him feel to admit it, Riley was just sort of hopeless. She never seemed to notice much outside of her own little world. Xander liked it about her. See, he wasn't a complete loser – he'd had one or two dates with girls, but they were all rebound girls – jaded and depressed. Danny had told him that deep down, Riley was just as fragile, but she made an effort not to show it. He liked that part of her, too.

"Xander, are you okay?" Riley gave him that wide-eyed gaze, "ya seem kind of out of it, you know? And since you're driving, it sorta worries me…"

"Well I'd be more worried if you were driving," Xander shot back, "you like to go fast. Faster than the law allows."

_And who would have ever knew, that we would ever be more than friends..._

God this song made him feel weird around her.

"You don't like my jam?" Riley asked, seeing Xander's face, "well, it's your car…and I want you to keep letting me in it. New car smell."

"You're doing it again," Xander told her, pulling over to the side of the road, "distracting me. Your jam is fine. Also, you could speak in complete sentences once in awhile."

"What, you don't like…uh, spontaneity? Yeah, that's it. Spontaneity. You need to loosen up, Xander. Complete sentences are boring."

"Go up to Mr. Lancer on Monday and tell him that."

"I will. I am so on it."

Xander sighed. He didn't like it when she was like this, though. Purposely defiant – wanting to start trouble for fun. He desperately wanted to say "you know that's not a turn on," but he bit his lip to fight it.

He didn't like spontaneity, really. He liked predictability. He wasn't compatible with Riley, he thought. He shouldn't feel the way he did about her – her impulsive personality contrasted starkly with his by-the-book lifestyles.

"When was the last time you did something just because it felt good?" Riley asked suddenly.

Xander couldn't answer. He knew he shouldn't be so nervous – why was he so determined to impress her?

Why, after a few seconds of hesitation, did he find himself kissing her?

It was the surprised look on her face when he pulled away that got his heart racing.

"How's that for spontaneous?" He asked smugly. Riley, being her impulsive self, couldn't help but practically jump him to put her arms around his neck and return the favor a hundred times over.

* * *

**Yeah, so Riley's all spontaneous and impulsive and Xander is not. I think it's adorable, I'm sorry if you don't XD.**


	15. Mm, Whatcha Say?

**So I'm finally at my grandparent's house...but they don't have internet so I'm at Starbucks right now.**

**This idea has been in my head for quite awhile, but I have no time or inspiration to make a story out of it.**

**Maybe someone else does.**

**Also, I don't like people trolling my fics kthnx.**

**Status: Adoptable  
**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**Danny was getting rather bored.

This new ghost – a pale, white, transparent female – wasn't what he was used to, but still...she refused to say her name, her motives, and her battle tactics were predictable. She didn't know when to quit, though, as he had been fighting her for almost an hour.

"Come now, boy," she finally spoke, her voice was clear as a bell, "admit that I am boring you."

"Uhm...okay?" Danny said, raising an eyebrow, "can we just end this?"

"Now why hadn't you said that before?" She gave him a look of sadness that he was sure wasn't genuine, "you must say what you mean. Open yourself up, no one likes a liar, boy."

The female ghost's eyes became red, and Danny swore he felt a fiery hot prickling running from his head all the way down to the base of his spine, and his head felt like it was about to explode. He closed his eyes from the pain, and when he finally reopened them, she was gone. He was left to groan and out of curiosity felt his forehead. The fiery feeling was gone, and he was cool to the touch again.

_'What the hell was that?"_

_

* * *

_Danny grunted in pain when he was slammed against his locker, and he looked up to see Dash Baxter glaring down at him.

"Fenton," the bully said, "where were ya this morning? I had all this frustration built up and no one to take it out on."

"I was fighting a ghost Dash, and I'm sorry that I wasn't there to fulfill your childish needs – isn't it time you found a new hobby? My dad says needlepoint is artsy and relaxing."

_'Wait, what?'_ He hadn't meant to say that out loud! He covered his mouth with his hands, but it was too late.

"What'd you say, Fenton?" Dash shouted. Oh boy, people were starting to stare...

"You heard me," oh man, why couldn't he stop talking? "Don't you have a puppy to kick or a virgin to despoil somewhere?* Seriously, people are starting to stare...I really don't like being seen with you."

Dash was seeing red, and Tucker put a nervous hand on his friend's shoulder.

"Dash, uh, he...he didn't mean that – ghost fighting? Please."

"Sure I meant it," stop talking, Danny! He began to panic, "Tucker, help me..."

"Right now the proper response is to walk away, dude. Or, you know, run..." Both boys decided to dash off while Dash was still confused in his rage. As soon as they were at Sam's locker, Danny fully began to panic.

"Danny, what's going on with you?" Sam asked, putting a hand on his shoulder after she heard Tucker's recount of past events.

"I—I don't know! I was fighting this girl ghost earlier, and for most of the time she didn't talk, but she that, like, 'admit I'm boring you' or something, and then got on my case for being a liar or some nonsense like that and then she told me 'say what you mean' and then I got this really weird feeling..."

It seemed to dawn on Tucker first, "dude, she made it so you can't lie!"

"no, no, it—it's more than that! It's like, every time something comes into my head, I can't help but say it out loud! Like, back there, I couldn't keep my freaking mouth shut! By the way I've always thought you look really good in that skirt-" Danny covered his mouth again, and Sam turned red and looked away, distracting herself by putting her books in her locker.

"This is going to be an issue..." Tucker stopped himself from chuckling long enough to speak. He peered into Sam's locker, "got any duct tape in there? I mean, unless you want him to keep telling you how pretty you are-"

"Tucker!"

* * *

***I swear I've seen this line somewhere, but I'm not sure where...but, it came to me just when I was writing this, and so I stuck it in there.**

**Hope you liked it. I snuck a little DxS in there...isn't it nice and blatantly obvious?  
**


	16. Challenge: Confessions

**So I'm giving a challenge! Accept it! If you want!**

**Challenge is simple: Ever since I first saw DP, I've had one question lingering in my mind. I've been looking for stories about it, but I've found very few.**

**Question? I know Dash is bigger and more popular and all, but that just doesn't explain _why_ he's so mean to Danny.**

**Challenge: Create a one-shot or two-shot explaining what you think the reason is.**

**Can it be slash? Sure.**

**Can there be OC's? Why not? To each their own. It may be my challenge, but it's your story.**

**Can there be pairings? Sure.**

**Can Danny be revealed? Sure, why not?  
**

**Can there be lemons? ...please no. If you can help it. Try not to go over a T rating.**

**Just put the two in a situation where they only have each other to talk to, and come up with the best reason you can to the question posed: Why is Dash so mean to Danny? Does it just come naturally? Is there some sort of past grudge involved? Is Dash possibly threatened by Danny for some reason? Something else?**

**Come on, guys. It'll be fun.**

**The below is just because I can't make this chapter nothing but an author's note. so this is just an example of a set-up. It doesn't have to be anything like this. I wrote it for kicks.**

**Good luck to any challenge acceptors.**

**-Phanny**

**(P.S. I announced it on dA because someone asked - Phanny is, in fact, not my real name. My parents aren't that mean.)  
**

**

* * *

**All Dash knew at that moment was that Danny Fenton, his own personal punching bag, was staring him down with an angry glare - he was _pissed._

"I can't believe what you did!" Dash swore he saw Fenton's eyes glow green for a moment. Not that he was scared of little Fenton anyway, but _still. _He regained his composure after a tiny flinch away from the smaller boy's gaze. Fenton was still talking.

"Do you see what you freaking did here?" Danny continued. Dash totally wished that someone would barge through the door of the broom closet they had barricaded themselves in for their own safety. "Do you have any idea? They're looking for - and do you know why, Dash? Because you couldn't freaking leave me a lone for one day! What is it with you? 'Oh gee, maybe I'll get Fenton if I put his name on a sticky note next to the pot of chili in the cafeteria that I put stuff in to make it _explode_ all over everyone!' You didn't get me, all you did was drag me down with you and you - _ugh_!"

Danny continued to seethe as he heard the angry students of Casper High charging through the hallways. If Dash wasn't here he could totally get out in a second…

"I don't need you yelling at me, Fenton!"

"Yes you do! You need someone yelling at you, obviously - my god, how stupid can a person get? _What is it with you_?"

Fenton suddenly leaned against a wall and sighed, staring at his shoes as he spoke again, his tone more subdued.

"Why are you so mean to me…?"

* * *

**Fill in the blank? Again, that's just to keep this chapter more than just an author's note, *Walker voice* because that _against the rules_, punk.**


	17. Repo!

**So I was watching Repo! The Genetic Opera, right? Right.**

**I was tempted. Nothing is probably going to come of this, I just wanted to try it out. I don't think it's very good. I suck at first person.**

**Status: ...whatever.  
**

**-Phanny**

**

* * *

**I'm sure you'd like to know what's going on.

What's that frail, skinny little guy doing running down the slick streets of Amity Park in the middle of the night? Well, if I don't pay attention to where I'm going, I'll be falling on my ass, but seriously…

You hear those sirens? Yeah? So does everyone else. I'm in trouble. Well, no, not just me. A lot of people. Hell, they might not even be coming for me tonight - maybe tomorrow, or the next day. I can never predict it. All I know is that they're coming, that my time is up.

My name is Danny. I was born December ninth, 2042. I'm fourteen now. We kids, we grow up so fast…

But seriously. When I was born, I wasn't in good shape. Half of my organs didn't work right - they were all sure I wasn't going to make it to an hour old. My mother and father were devastated. They wished that there was something they could do for me. I remember my mom telling me this story all the time, about how strong I was, but I knew that she was still scared, because she remembered when I was a tiny baby trapped in a glass box, running on nothing with tubes sticking out of me. That's all my parents knew me as - something fragile.

How did I get here? DALV.

Vlad Masters was the head of the DALV corporation - they specialized in new branches of science. He said that they could fix me.

My dad asked how much.

Vlad said no charge.

If you think that's too good to be true, well…you caught on faster than my parents…

Several major organ transplants later, I was about as healthy as I could get. Those organs were property of DALV, but Vlad said the payments were negotiable - they would pay it all off monthly over the years in several installments until their debt was gone, whatever my parents could manage. And this worked.

Until mom died.

When mom died, Vlad's demeanor changed completely. Negotiable payments? They were set at an amount my dad couldn't manage. Grace periods? Gone.

My dad's monthly payment for the transplants I had received so many years ago was late this month, and that seemed to be the last straw for Vlad. Ever since mom left the picture, his well of never ending sympathy seemed to have run dry, and he was through giving us second chances.

Hear those sirens? Those are DALV trucks. DALV didn't like giving away services to people that couldn't pay. All people who couldn't pay for their plastic surgeries? DALV sent out people to fetch them - the surgeries would be reversed. Genetic modifications? DALV took care of that too.

My shoe lost its grip on the ground and I slipped, scraping my knee as I ducked into and alley, gasping for air. I had never run that much in my life.

I don't even know what I'm doing out here…I woke up earlier to hear banging going on around the house, and my dad shouting at me through my bedroom door to run.

My body couldn't take the exertion I had put on it - I leaned over and began to retch, feeling bile rise in my throat. Shit, just what I need…

The sirens came closer, and I froze. The one last thing to mention? Along with the reversing surgeries and taking away any modification anyone got, the fact remained that any organs transplanted into anyone wouldn't escape the same treatment. Almost half of my insides belonged to DALV.

Those sirens also signaled the repo man, here to take back company property.

And you can be pretty damn sure that they don't give a shit if I'm alive and awake when they do it.

* * *

**Ectoplasm comes in a little glass vial, btw.**


	18. Challenge: Danny v Food

**It's another challenge, guys! And it's a weird and dumb one, too!**

**So I was watching Man v. Food, right? And Adam was doing one of those spicy challenges, and I decided...why not?**

**So Danny did something to Dash (it does NOT have to be the same thing I put in this snippet), and Tucker decided that, instead of hurting each other, they should try and scarf down some spicy food. I mean seriously spicy.**

**Like 80x hotter than a Jalapeno spicy.**

**It's a challenge...ABOUT A CHALLENGE.**

**No, I don't know why this strikes me as funny.  
**

***dodges tomatoes***

**-Phanny  
**

* * *

"You don't have to do this, man." Tucker told him.

"Danny, look around. No one's going to think less of you if you back out." Sam added.

Danny could barely hear his friends over the blood rushing in his ears. The pounding music in the crowded sushi restaurant did nothing to help, either. Danny looked down at the plate in front of him - a row of five of the hottest spicy tuna rolls in the country. He looked at the boy beside him, Dash Baxter, who had the same challenge on his plate.

Dash glared, and Danny returned the favor.

It started with a dare. Danny had almost had a repeat of last Halloween's incident - except not only did he knock paint over onto Dash's letterman jacket again, but the blue goop had gotten all over Dash's upper body. Tucker had intervened when Dash looked about to give Danny another underwear-eating ultimatum and said what he thought was something that would help.

He had challenged them both to go to The Mix, the sushi restaurant downtown and take the challenge. Eat five of the spiciest tuna rolls in the country in one hour. Whoever finished first won.

Why did he have to accept…?

"All right, boys," the owner of the Restaurant said, putting one hand on each of their shoulders, "you got one hour. Good luck."

Danny took his chopsticks and bravely stuck a roll into his mouth.

He may as well have swallowed a fireball.

* * *

**Yeah...I don't have any real rules or restrictions. So...uhm...yeah I just wanted an excuse to put this up because I can't think of anything to build around it.**

**Have fun if you want to bother.  
**


	19. Solidus

**So first I went and did a Repo! AU, now Bioshock?**

**Damn right. Bioshock is awesome.**

**I just thought I'd post the first chapter here. I think I want to do a full story, but it will only be posted on deviantART, just because I feel like it. Go read it there.**

**Status: I am going to write this myself, but I suppose if you really,_ really_ wanted to put your own spin on it, you could try it.  
**

**Also, y'all should know that, before I added this author's note, the word count of this document was 666. Hmm...**

**-Phanny**

* * *

Where was he?

Dash Baxter sat up - something he regretted as he was struck with a wave of pain in his head. The back of his skull throbbed like he had been hit - which, he reminded himself, he most likely had.

The young man looked around, his eyes adjusting to the darkness. There was a faint green glow all around him, but he was in an enclosed space. Outside one of the glass walls he saw an otherworldly shade of green and nothing more, save for a few dark spots here and there.

Looking around some more, Dash saw various signs and posters, and even though he was afraid to move in this place, he walked towards each of them and attempted to make out the words.

_Down with Masters!_

_WE ARE OUR OWN PEOPLE!_

_Corruption has struck! THIS IS THE LAST STRAW!_

Some of the signs were on the ground, and Dash realized with horror that some were covered with spots of blood and another mysterious green substance that he couldn't identify. What had happened here?

Dash walked forward, feeling the need to get away from where he currently was, even though he had no idea whether or not something worse awaited him.

Dash's foot struck something on the ground, and he looked at his feet. A large tape recorder lay not far away from where he was standing, undoubtedly the thing he had accidentally kicked. A small LED screen displayed a title and what he assumed would be the maker of the recording.

"Vlad Masters: A Message to the People…" Dash muttered, reading it aloud. He pressed play. An aged, sophisticated male voice began to emit from the object, and Dash listened.

"_My loyal citizens of Solidus, I'm afraid I must inform you of some necessary changes. I have heard many notices of a so-called 'resistance' hiding among our people, plotting to take me down. Well, I can't allow my people to just flounder without a leader, so measure must be put in place. A curfew of seven o'clock is in place - any wandering through our town after that is considered suspicious activity, and the perpetrator will be subject to questioning. The Gatherers will be under constant supervision, do not approach the Gatherers. Their protectors are authorized to use force. Security cameras will run at all times. Searches of homes are allowed. _

_My people, there are necessary measures. The only thing I need to relieve these measures is your loyalty, please show me I have that at least…"_

Dash had never been so confused in his life-

A crackling sound took over the recorder, and a younger male voice began to play.

"_Haha…Glad Tucker showed me how to tape over that load of bullshit…and I do mean that. This guy's so full of it. Listen here, Masters - yeah, I got a little hide out, and a group of friends doin' what we need to survive in the hellhole - but let me make one thing perfectly clear: I ain't planning' no revolution. My family and I want out, and we'll find a way. The only time you'd need to worry is if you try to stand in my way, old man…I ain't a violent kid by nature, but you mess with Danny Fenton, sir, then you get what you deserve."_

Dash couldn't decide which recording was worse - what was wrong with these people? What had happened in this place?

Dash put the tape recorder down, and he idly put his hands into his coat pockets as he continued to walk. Or at least, he began to walk…

Dash pulled out a folded piece of paper from his jacket pocket - something he was sure hadn't been there before. He unfolded it and struggled to read it in the faint light around him.

_Watch out for the ghosts, head to the building shaped like a skull and go out the back, don't get caught._

_-S.M. _

* * *

**So yeah. Yes, I AM using audio diaries in this. Because they help tell a story within a story and they are one of my favorite things about Bioshock.**

**I don't know why Dash is the main character.  
**


	20. The Curse

So, I promised myself I wouldn't make a chapter without any actual story, and I failed. I also wanted to post this as a challenge, but I know that won't get done, since only one or two people have done my challenges, and I REALLY want to write this.

The thing is, guys, it's summer, and so I have more free time.

I've always wanted to try a collab fic with someone, maybe. Just because I got this idea I think is interesting, and I think it has been perfectly clear that I absolutely suck at getting things done on my own.

I was watching Holes earlier, so part of this came from that, but not exactly.

Here's the dealio:

Almost a hundred years ago, an witch named Mary Elizabeth Fenton was cast out on the streets in the cold rain by a cruel Wesley Baxter, who did not know what power she held. Disgusted by his behavior, Mary Elizabeth cursed him for his cruelty.

"There will be no bright outlook for your future," she had said, "you and your children, and your children's children, and everyone after you will pay for your cruelty. The only luck you will ever have is bad luck."

A hundred years after the fact, every male in the Baxter family has been afflicted with the curse once they reached the age of fifteen, and the only way to break the curse is for one of them to show true compassion and kindness for someone less fortunate than themselves.

When Dash Baxter turned fifteen, his life started to go downhill. He tore his shoulder and was kicked off of the football team - and out of the A-List. When he finds out that Danny Fenton may be the key to ending his curse, he has to spend more time with him and his friends.

Dash must show compassion to others, which he will have plenty of chances to do, seeing as how this curse has forced him to experience life at the bottom of Casper High's social ladder.

So, it's pretty much "walk in someone else's shoes and see how unnecessarily difficult you have made their lives you big douche."

I just love stories where Dash may be revealed to have hidden depths, and where he realizes the errors of his ways. I don't know why I like the guy so much. :/

NOTE: Can of Worms and Raven are going to get done. Eventually. So will All That Jazz.


	21. Family Reunion

**So I'm in a hotel room in Alabama on my way home after a week in North Carolina visiting my very large extended family. I wrote this last night at my grandma's house but she doesn't have Internet. Be glad I even wrote it - sometimes when there's no internet I forget my computer even works.**

**A few updates: Raven is done. Can of Worms will follow eventually.**

**They have so many nice Southern chain restaurants that I don't have where I live.**

**Baby spit isn't as cute as an actual baby. Especially if it's on your pant leg.**

**And granddaddy will eat everything sugary he can find even though he is not supposed to.**

**Back to the story.  
**

**I just suddenly thought of this idea and I thought it would be funny. I'm not going to continue it, but someone can if they want.** **So, status: Adoptable**

* * *

"Dad, why are we doing this?" Dash Baxter asked his father as he picked out an outfit for himself. He hated special occasions that he had to dress up for, and even though tonight was not one of those events, his father still made him select an outfit that was more formal than he normally wore.

"Because, son," even a newcomer would recognize Alan Baxter's tone, the one of a man who had explained something over and over many times before, "Wendy is important to me. She invited us to her family reunion so she can introduce us, and I want to make a good impression."

"Why are they even having a reunion? I hear they all live in town."

"A couple of people come in from out of town every now and then, and they try to get together when that happens. Also, there's a stain on that shirt, get a clean one."

Dash rifled through his closet, tossing unnoticed disdainful looks at his father, who was standing in the doorway, already dressed and prepared to leave. Only when the doorbell rang did he turn a blind eye to his son.

Dash narrowed his eyes at nothing when he heard Wendy's voice. His mother and father had been divorced for a little over a year and here was this woman shoving her way into his and his father's lives. Dash knew Wendy made his father happy, but he just couldn't stand her. She wasn't mean, she didn't yell, she wasn't boring, but Dash just didn't like her. He couldn't understand it, but there were a lot of things Dash Baxter didn't understand, so he just went with it.

"Dash, are you ready now?" Alan's voice carried through the house. Dash sighed and threw something on. Why should he impress these people? If there were kids, he wouldn't need to. He was Dash Baxter, they would already be impressed.

Dash silently walked out the door with his father and Wendy, got in the car with his father and Wendy, and drove to the restaurant with his father and _Wendy._ He didn't like that he had to attach her name to everything they did just because she happened to exist.

Dash knew the entire restaurant had been reserved for family, but when they arrived Dash was sure the place was open to everyone. There were _so many people_. Was this mess Wendy's family or had they forgotten to reserve the place entirely?

"Wendy!" A perky blonde woman greeted his father's – ugh – _female friend_ with a smile and a hug. "Glad you could make it! Ooh, is this Alan?"

"It sure is, and his son Dash," Wendy put her hand on Dash's back and pushed him forward to greet the blonde woman. She smiled a pearly white smile and held out her hand. Dash just frowned. The woman's smile flickered.

"Well…" She fumbled for words, "he's…charming."

"Sorry, uhm…" Dash's father began, trailing off.

"Jill," the blond woman filled in the blank for him. Unlike his son, Alan shook her hand politely.

"Jill. I guess he's not in the mood for manners today."

"Oh well, one bit of my sister-in-law's cookies with clear that gloom right up! Come on in and have a seat anywhere you like."

Dash decided to scout the dining room. He saw plenty of adults chatting, but what struck him the most was how many kids there were. They were _everywhere_. There were babies and toddlers and older kids and teens and—

Wait.

Dash looked harder into the crowd and he saw him. He had a baby boy on his lap and was talking to another girl his age. Dash panicked and looked up at the banner in the restaurant.

_"Fenton Family Reunion"_

When Dash looked back at where he had previously been gazing, he met a bright blue and equally horrified stare.

Danny Fenton was related to his father's girlfriend.

_Oh shit._

* * *

**GET OUT NOW OR BE A FENTON FOREVER  
**

**Wendy and Jill are two of my actual aunts' names.**


	22. Making Progress

**Well, since I finished _Raven_, I've been thinking - what if I made a few oneshots/drabbles about Danny and friends adjusting to normal life after such a long...eventful journey. And the amusement that would come with Danny not having had any contact with the outside world until he was fourteen.**

**Also this is sort of based on actual events.**

**Readers: in order to get this, you would probably have to read _Raven_ first. Duh.**

**Also, I'm thinking of putting _All That Jazz _up for adoption since I'm unlikely to finish it any time soon.  
**

**-Phanny**

* * *

Blue eyes stared at the contraption before them, scanning it and calculating possible weaknesses in its design. It had a metallic sheen to it, but not like the malicious gleam of objects in his past that he'd rather not remember. It was simple, shiny, and he knew its function was benign and average.

But Danny couldn't stand this microwave.

Sam and Tucker were worried about him. Danny had been denied many things in his childhood - a family, friends, and knowledge of modern technology other than that which would serve to harm him. Ever since the winged boy and his friends had moved in with his parents and sister, he had shied away from anything he was unfamiliar with. Nobody could blame him.

Today, though, Danny was determined to cook his own meal without any help. Not from his parents, not from his sister, not from his best friend, and not from his girlfriend. No, this was _Danny's _day.

"Remove covering and heat for three and a half minutes," Danny muttered to himself, reading the package of instant noodles he had retrieved from the pantry, "easy enough."

Danny put the package into the microwave and put in three-zero-zero, and then pressed start. A small hum came from the machine, and Danny walked away, feeling a accomplished.

He encountered Sam on his way out of the kitchen, and she looked proud of him. However, after a moment, she wrinkled her nose as an acrid smell spread through the air.

"You didn't put water in it, did you?"

Danny's eyes widened, and he realized that the awful smell was smoke coming from his would-be dinner.

"Oh no…" His wings spread out in surprise as a fire alarm went off, and he grimaced at his failure.

Danny was not allowed to touch any appliance in the Fenton household ever again, but his mother encouraged him slightly - after all, it didn't _explode_.

…Unlike the blender, and how he managed to make _that_ happen was an event that still had everyone confused.

* * *

_**...how do you make a blender explode.**_


	23. Everyone Loves Radiation

**Plot bunny! Have a plot carrot, darling.**

**Plot Bunny: *omnomnom***

**Adorable _and _adoptable~!  
**

**-Phanny**

* * *

Sam had always figured that being best friends with a half-ghost boy would make her life interesting, but she wasn't ever suspecting that it would have side-effects. Really, she didn't even really know when she and her other friend, Tucker, had acquired these "side-effects," only remembering the day she herself had discovered one of them.

Sam recalled the day perfectly - she had been cooking. She wasn't sure if she could call cooking a hobby of hers - her parents refused to prepare meals that would suit an ultra-recyclo vegetarian (she supposed you _could _say she was a vegan, if you wanted to be _boring_) such as herself. They thought she was just being difficult and wouldn't 'give in,' even though meat and many animal products really did make her sick most of the time.

Back on topic: she was cooking her own dinner, as she usually had to, and was a little careless at one point - she placed her hand on a hot burner and it took her a little under five seconds for it to actually register that it was in fact very hot and she should probably remove her hand from it. She looked at the nasty burn on her hand - it looked like it was definitely going to scar. She ran her hand under cold water, wincing at the sting. She should probably go to the doctor, and she would have had the burn not started to heal before her eyes.

"Holy-" she cut off her own cursing, trying not to alert anyone in the house in case her parents decided to suddenly remember they had a daughter. She yanked her hand out from under the stream of water from the sink, and watched as the redness on her hand began to fade as the skin repaired itself as she stared in awe. The only time she had seen that kind of healing was when Danny hurt himself. Maybe hanging around him was having some sort of effect on her, but then, if that was true, wouldn't Tucker…

_Tucker._

She called her friend up immediately, not bothering to try and put what she had to say together to form something coherent. Admittedly, she probably should have - she was sure "Tucker! Quick! Go cut yourself!" was not what Tucker wanted to hear coming from the other end of the phone line.

"This better be you, Sam, otherwise I want to know how a creeper got my phone number."

"Yes, it's me, sorry," Sam amended before continuing, "but seriously. I meant that I just burned myself on my stove really bad but it healed in like two minutes! I figure maybe hanging out with Danny might have some side-effects, and I want to know if it's just me."

There was a long, agonizing pause over the phone, "so…you want to test your theory by having me get a knife and cut myself to see if it heals?" Tucker sounded like she was asking him to jump off of a cliff.

"Exactly!"

"…I feel like I should hang up on you. I really do."

"Tucker, I'm serious. This is weird!" Sam heard shuffling over the phone, along with a muttered 'the things I do for you guys…'

There was a sharp intake of breath and, after a moment, and exclamation of "holy crap, Sam!"

"I know, right?"

Sam could almost see her friend gaping at his already healed hand in awe, and her mind wandered to the real issue.

How was this even possible?

* * *

"Well, theoretically, it isn't impossible," Maddie Fenton said to her son.

Danny Fenton had just come downstairs to his parents' lab after getting off of the phone with his two best friends, determined to figure out what the cause of their little issue could be.

Danny was silent as his mother continued, "these Haz-Mat suits aren't just to protect from chemicals, Danny. Ghosts can give off a certain amount of radiation that could, in theory, transfer some of their abilities onto humans and other creatures with whom they are in close contact on a regular basis for an extended period of time. Of course, it would take months or years for these effects to show."

Danny paled, if that was even possible - he had gotten his powers when he was fourteen, and he was now sixteen. That was _two years_, and he had seen his friends nearly every day during that time. Could halfas give off that radiation stuff? Well, he couldn't ask his mother, and from what his friends had said, the answer must be yes.

"It could very likely be dangerous," his mother continued, "we don't quite know the effects of ectoplasm mixing with human DNA…"

'You _don't, anyway,' _Danny added in his mind. He felt slightly relieved. Being a halfa hadn't really done him any harm, so maybe a few small changes in his friends wouldn't cause too much damage.

"Thanks mom," Danny said, not really sure whether or not his mom had stopped talking yet, and he walked up the stairs. Not before his mind added its own epilogue, anyway.

_A few _small_ changes…for now._

* * *

__**Okay, where the hell did this come from?**

**...I don't know. I've seen a lot of Sam and Tucker halfa stories around lately...I deserve fun too!  
**


	24. Creative Friendship

**This is what exam week does to me.**

**Riley is in this. Deal with it.  
**

_Italic is Riley  
_

_**Bold italic is Sam.**  
_

**-Phanny  
**

* * *

When the universe wasn't picking on Sam's friends, it was picking on her. The situation she had found herself in couldn't possibly be karma – she hadn't done anything wrong (that wasn't for the greater good), she hadn't insulted anybody (not people who didn't deserve it, anyway), and she had done all her homework, unlike Danny and Tucker (okay, she _may _have let them copy, but not verbatim – that would be wrong).

All of this was what Sam considered "being good," so why was the nasty universe (in the form of Mr. Lancer and, before him, the scheduling people), making her suffer?

The beginning would probably be a good place to start. Sam was in her second semester of her junior year of high school, and she had _specifically _requested to take an art class, but no, the office decided that she should be in a creative writing class. This was an acceptable solution, she had thought, because she liked writing too.

When she stepped into Mr. Lancer's creative writing class at the beginning of January, she discovered that the scheduling people in the office must have not given her the art class because they hated her. That had to be the reason, because as soon as she walked into the room, she heard it.

"Hi Sam!"

_Oh my god._

Elective classes like creative writing were some of the few classes that mixed together students in different grades. Maybe it was just a coincidence, or maybe Riley Matthews had just accidentally walked into the wrong class (she wasn't too bright, so it was possible – probable, even). There had to be some absolutely diabolical reason as to why the girl was in here. Was she following Sam?

Riley was a freshman who had found out about Danny's powers by complete accident, forcing Team Phantom to have to associate with her because if they didn't she probably wouldn't be able to keep her mouth shut. Once she was somewhat "accepted" into the group (she seemed completely ignorant of how begrudgingly the decision was made), she decided that she now had only two goals.

One, become a cheerleader, which she had miraculously done.

Two, be Sam's BFF. This proved to be easier said than done. But, to Sam's growing annoyance, _she just kept trying._

Admittedly, she had grown on Sam a little – once she finally realized that the girl wasn't going to go away until Sam graduated, she tried her best to get along with her and put up with her eccentricities (re: refrained from hitting her). This would be fine if Sam only saw her once in awhile.

But she was _everywhere. _

That's how Sam found herself sitting in front of Riley for the first month of school, thinking that she should be getting award for her incredible amount of patience.

"Hey Sam?"

"Yes, Riley?"

"You wanna hear a funny story?"

"No, not really."

"Awww…why not?"

"I've heard all of your funny stories at least three times, Riley."

"You haven't heard _this _one."

"Yes I have."

"…huh. I think you're right."

"I often am."

This was a daily conversation. Riley's stories were always significantly un-funny, and it was amazing that, with every telling, they managed to get less funny.

"All right, students," Mr. Lancer said from the front of the classroom one day, "I'm going to assign you partners today, and you'll have two weeks to work on a group story." It was then that Lancer gave same _the look. _Sam knew the look. She knew what it meant. Lancer was going to make a decision that he knew Sam would not like.

"Partners are as follows…"

_He wouldn't do this to me._

"Tara and Brittany…"

_I'm a good student._

"Hannah and Max…"

_He's gonna do it._

"Sam and Riley…"

_Oh god. He did it._

Sam felt so betrayed. He was one of this guy's best students and he goes and pulls this! Not only was she stuck with the girl she dedicated a lot of her time trying to get away from, she couldn't help but panic about what it would do to her grade. Sam didn't like to sugar coat things, so where other people would say Riley "wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed," or "brightest crayon in the box," Sam spoke only the truth. Riley was dumb as a post.

When the bell rang twenty minutes later, Lancer seemed to be expecting Sam to stop by his desk on her way out, looking bewildered.

"I'm not changing your partner, Ms. Manson," he said before Sam could even say a word.

"But—" Sam thought for a moment, "you see, you of all people know I have an A average, here, and Riley's just sort of…average."

"Exactly," Lancer said, and Sam realized that she had given him information to be used against her, "with your help I'm sure can get her first decent grade in this class. I don't want to read any more stories about a zebraleff…thing."

"Zebrelephaffe," Sam corrected automatically, "it's a zebra-elephant-giraffe hybrid." Sam realized what she had just said and her eyes widened. _Why do I know that?_

"Right, that," Lancer continued, "Ms. Manson, I make my partnering decisions based on observation. You seemed like you could help her out, and are also the least likely to kill her."

"Yeah, well…" Sam mumbled as she wandered out of the classroom, "let's hope you're right about that…"

* * *

"So, let me get this straight," Riley paced in front of the couch in her living room on which Sam was currently sitting, "we're partners, but so far you've shut down all my ideas."

"Exactly," Sam said, looking bored out of her mind, "I made it clear when we started – no princesses no ponies, no unicorns, no pegasi, no zebrelephaffes, no candy kingdoms, no octopus banquets, and no princesses riding unicorns, ponies, and pegasi through candy kingdoms to find the rumored zebrelephaffe so that they can lead it to the octopus banquet."

Riley looked surprised that Sam had remembered everything, seeing as she had been looking at Memebase on her laptop all the while Riley was speaking to her, and could only murmur "phooey" in response.

That is, until she started talking again, "well, what do _you _want to write about?"

Sam's eyes widened. She had been so busy turning down Riley's insane ideas that she hadn't thought of any herself.

"Uh…"

"Exactly," Riley sniffed, "now…about the octopuses…"

"Octopi, and _no._" Sam said firmly before thinking again, "okay, why don't we just take turns. There's a setting on my laptop that can record voices and type out what it hears. Start telling your story, and then I'll say some of mine, and then we go back to you."

"Oh my gosh, story time!" Riley said excitedly, "hooray!"

"Don't make me regret this, honey," Sam said dryly, adding the pet name to sound condescending, but the effect was lost on the younger girl.

"Oh, okay," Riley sat down on the chair next to the couch, "Riley Matthews story extravaganza begins…now!"

_Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess named…uhm…Jeri!_

_**Jerry? That's a guy's name. That's not a princess name.**_

_It has only one 'r' and an 'i,' Sam. That makes it feminine!_

_**If you say so…**_

_Anyway, Princess Jeri decided to go for a walk in the candy woods because…I guess she was bored. Being a princess is a boring job, when you think about it. So, as she approached the candy forest to find some fun…_

_**She took a detour to a swamp, where she fell in the mud and ruined whatever insanely expensive pink dress her parents had spoiled her with, and then came a hungry crocodile—**_

_SAM!_

_**I feel like going for realism here. There are crocodiles in swamps!**_

_Our heroine is not getting eaten when we're barely into the story! Don't be all dark and stuff._

_**Fine. She won't get eaten. She'll lose a limb. Then she'll deal with hardship and grow as a person.**_

…_After losing her left arm to a spontaneous crocodile attack, Jeri continued along the trail, going the right way this time and looking for her woodland friends—_

_**Wait, are her woodland friends also made of candy?**_

…_I AM TELLING THE STORY. As Jeri looked around for her woodland friends—_

_**Because it would be weird if they were. Jeri gets hungry and she just goes and eats a squirrel made of candy…not very princessy.**_

_SUDDENLY Jeri found a woodland friend after many unnecessary interruptions, and it was a friendly llama—_

_**Llamas do not live in the woods. Not in candy woods.**_

_Oh like you know what happens in candy woods!_

_**I know what doesn't happen in candy woods! Llamas don't happen!**_

_Do you want to tell the story?_

_**Yes.**_

_Fine._

_**Okay, since princess Jeri freaked out from the shock of seeing a candy llama in the candy woods since that's not where candy llamas live, she ran into a tree made of cotton candy and got stuck to it. Forever. When night fell a giant candy spider came down from its web and—**_

_Why do you keep making things eat her?_

_**This is realism! The spider smells the blood from the bleeding stump of her arm and wants to eat her. What else do you expect? You only gave me princesses and candy to work with! I cannot make a brilliant epic with princesses and candy!**_

_So the spider decided not to eat Jeri and instead unstuck her from the tree as a gesture of friendship. But then, for some reason, the giant spider was very cold to Jeri for no reason. Jeri tried her best to be friends with the spider, but the spider just didn't care about her._

…_**Maybe it wasn't that the spider didn't care about Jeri, maybe Jeri was just a little too clingy and the spider wanted some time away from her. Maybe if Jeri wasn't so loud and annoying all the time, then the spider would like her more.**_

_But Jeri just wanted the spider like her and know that she cared and wanted to be friends! Even though the spider was all gloomy and Jeri was sunshine incarnate, Jeri thought they could get along, but the spider just kept being mean…it made Jeri really sad._

_**Maybe if Jeri didn't act so sunny all the time then the spider might have realized that Jeri was upset and might have even apologized. But no, Jeri continued to act like nothing was wrong and so the spider didn't know how she felt.**_

_So Jeri decided to calm down a little more and not be so pushy so that the spider would like her more, because Jeri didn't have many friends and really wanted to be friends with the spider so that they wouldn't fight all the time. So Jeri said to the spider, "I won't annoy you as much, and we can be friends!"_

_**And the spider was all, "whatevs."**_

_**The End**_

"Riley," Sam said, her voice strained by pressure, "I know you're a hugger, but this is a vice grip."

Riley, who had had her arms wrapped around Sam in a hug to end all hugs, quickly let go, "sorry. It's just that now that we're friends I feel like hugging you."

"Yeah, well…don't try to choke me," Sam told her absently, looking down at the document her laptop has composed for her from their recording.

"Okay, small problem," she began, "I'm glad we had this little breakthrough in our relationship, but…"

"But what?" Riley had a frightened look on her face. Was Sam going to take her friendship back?

"This story sucks," Sam's eyes scanned the page again, "it was about almost nothing until the end, and most of the page is us fighting."

"So? It's creative! Put our names on it, print it out, hand it in! Not everything has to be perfect."

"I am not handing this mess in," Sam insisted, "let me fix it."

"No," Riley pleaded, "come on…it shows we worked together and Mr. Lancer won't know it was us fighting…he'll just think we're funny!"

"Or demented."

"Oh well. You win some, you lose some."

* * *

The day after his assignment was due, Lancer had to read through a _lot _of awful stories. He judged them on creativity (and some of them were direct copies off of books his students had read with names changed), teamwork (it was painfully obvious on some of them that only one partner had done any work), and how interesting it was (this was a fairly small part of the grade seeing as it was very subjective).

After many substandard papers, Lancer wasn't quite ready for 'Princess Jeri and the Candy Spider.'

As he read the three page mess, his expression growing more and more confused with every word, he realized that he really didn't know how to grade it. It was original, more original than some others, anyway, it was obviously a team effort, and, despite its confusing format, it was pretty damn entertaining. It was even a little heartwarming at the end, and he had noticed that Sam hadn't been nearly as cold to Riley as he was used to seeing.

Still, Lancer still couldn't shake the first thought that came into his mind after he had finished reading it.

"What the hell did I just read?"

* * *

**It looks like this friendship**

***puts on sunglasses*  
**

**Got a little bit sweeter.  
**

**_~YEEEAAAAAHHH!~_  
**


End file.
